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How to Build Financial Harmony with Your Partner (No Stress)
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Let’s be honest.
Few phrases kill romance faster than:
"Hey... can we talk about our retirement projections?"
But here’s the reality: avoiding financial conversations doesn’t protect your relationship — it just postpones the stress.
Money is one of the leading causes of conflict in relationships. The good news? When couples approach financial planning as a team, they build trust, reduce anxiety, and dramatically improve their long-term success.
You don’t need spreadsheets at dinner. You just need the right conversations at the right time.
Stage 1: New Relationships (Focus on Values)
If you’re newly dating, this is not the time to request a credit report. But it is the time to understand values.
1. The Billionaire Question: "If you were a billionaire, what would you do?"
Would they:
- Buy three yachts?
- Fund charities?
- Invest and live modestly?
- Pay off everyone’s debt at Thanksgiving?
This fun question reveals priorities fast. You’re not judging — you’re observing. Financial compatibility often starts with shared values.
(And if they say "crypto zoo," ask follow-up questions.)
2. The Debt Mindset: "How do you feel about debt?"
Everyone has opinions about debt. Some see it as a financial tool. Others treat it like a contagious disease.
Understanding your partner’s mindset around student loans, credit cards, or mortgages gives you early insight into how they handle financial responsibility.
No interrogation required — just curiosity.
3. The Splurge Check: "What was your latest splurge?"
This one’s harmless... and revealing.
Was it:
- A luxury handbag?
- A spontaneous weekend trip?
- A 72-inch TV they "had to have"?
More importantly — was it planned and saved for, or financed at checkout?
Spending habits tell you far more than income ever will.
Stage 2: Committed Partnerships (Focus on Strategy)
If you’ve been together for years, money talks should evolve from playful to purposeful.
No one expects retirement spreadsheets during date night — but alignment matters.
Aligning Your Retirement Vision: Are You Dreaming the Same Dream?
One of you may picture:
- Beach sunsets
- Travel and adventure
- A second home
The other might picture:
- Staying local
- Gardening
- Yelling at cable news
Neither is wrong — but misalignment can get expensive.
Retirement planning for couples works best when you agree on:
Without a shared vision, you’re just guessing.
The Foundation: Do You Have an Emergency Fund — or Just Optimism?
An emergency fund isn’t exciting.
But neither is a surprise furnace replacement.
Most couples should aim for 3–6 months of expenses in accessible savings. It’s not glamorous
— but it’s powerful.
Financial security reduces stress. And less stress? Better relationship.
Stage 3: Approaching Retirement (Protecting the Future)
As retirement gets closer, the conversation shifts from "Are we saving enough?" to "Will this last?" That’s where retirement income planning becomes critical.
Securing Your Income: How Much Retirement Income Do You Actually Need?
Retirement isn’t just about stopping work. It’s about maintaining lifestyle.
Ask yourselves:
- Are we traveling frequently?
- Helping grandkids with college?
- Downsizing or upgrading?
- Finally buying that boat?
Understanding your income sources — Social Security, pensions, IRAs, 401(k)s — helps you determine whether your plan supports your goals.
Because "winging it" is not a retirement strategy.
Protecting Your Legacy: Do You Have an Estate Plan — or Just Good Intentions?
Estate planning isn’t only for the ultra-wealthy.
It’s about:
- Protecting your spouse
- Avoiding unnecessary legal headaches
- Ensuring your assets go where you intend
A will, power of attorney, healthcare directive, and updated beneficiaries are foundational.
If your estate plan is older than your grandkids, it may be time for a review.
The Real Secret to Financial Compatibility
Couples who talk openly about money tend to:
Money conversations aren’t romantic.
But financial clarity? That’s attractive.
Ready to Turn "We Should Talk About This" Into a Real Plan?
You don’t need more financial stress.
You need structure.
If you and your partner haven’t recently reviewed your:
- Retirement strategy
- Emergency savings
- Investment allocation
- Debt plan
- Estate documents
you may have blind spots.
A coordinated financial plan can help you:
Let’s make sure your financial future is as strong as your relationship. Schedule your complimentary financial strategy consultation today.
Jonathon Merickel has always loved helping people accomplish their goals. He believes financial advising is unique in that it allows him to work with individuals and families across every stage of life, from early accumulation years to retirement and beyond. Over the years, Jonathon has seen firsthand how life rarely goes exactly according to plan. That’s why he believes great financial planning must be flexible, personal, and grounded in real human experience. His role is to help clients navigate both planned milestones and unexpected changes with confidence and clarity. In addition to working with clients, Jonathon is actively involved in the financial planning community and currently serves as a Board Member of FPA Illinois, supporting the profession and its future.
Material prepared herein has been created for informational purposes only and should not be considered investment advice or a recommendation. Information was obtained from sources believed to be reliable but was not verified for accuracy. It is important to note that federal tax laws under the Internal Revenue Code (IRC) of the United States are subject to change, therefore it is the responsibility of taxpayers to verify their taxation obligations.
Jonathon Merickel is an investment adviser representative with Savvy Advisors, Inc. (“Savvy Advisors”). Savvy Advisors is an SEC registered investment advisor. The views and opinions expressed herein are those of the speakers and authors and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Savvy Advisors. Information contained herein has been obtained from sources believed to be reliable, but are not assured as to accuracy.
